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Our social media feed is full of parents trading ideas on what to pack for college. In honor of all of those who are taking a leap into the collegiate world, including Dr. Kardos’s own children, we share again the letter Dr. Lai wrote for her child the night before kindergarten. As Gretchen Rubin said, “the days are long but the years are short.” As time moves forward, your child’s transitions may differ, yet they still will feel the same.

My Child,

As we sit, the night before kindergarten, your toes peeking out from under the comforter, I notice that your toes are not so little anymore. 

Tomorrow those toes will step up onto to the bus and carry you away from me.   Another step towards independence.   Another step to a place where I can protect you less.  But I do notice that those toes have feet and legs which are getting stronger.   You’re not as wobbly as you used to be.  Each time you take a step you seem to go farther and farther. 

I  trust that you will remember what I’ve taught you.  Look both ways before you cross the street, chose friends who are nice to you, and whatever happens don’t eat yellow snow. I also trust that there are other eyes and hearts who will watch and guide you. 

But that won’t stop me from worrying about each step you take. 

Won’t stop me from holding my breath­. 

Just like when you first started to walk, I’ll always worry when you falter. 

I smile because I know you’ll hop up onto the bus tomorrow, proud as punch, laughing and disappearing in a sea of waving hands.  I just hope that at some point, those independent feet will proudly walk back and stand beside me.   

Maybe it will be when you first gaze into your newborn’s eyes, or maybe it will be when your child climbs onto the bus. 

Until then,

I hold my breath each time you take a step.

Love,
Mommy

Julie Kardos, MD and Naline Lai, MD
©2021 Two Peds in a Pod®

 

Today , Dr. Lai shares with us the texting guidelines she will be giving to her daughter as she goes away for college (wasn’t kindergarten just yesterday?). We can all learn from this list.

–Dr. Kardos

Text me to share a funny meme.

Text me to wish me a happy birthday and then follow it with a call.

Text me if you are about to go over our shared data plan.

Text me if you are deciding whether to study abroad.

Text me sooner than the day before spring break about your spring break plans.

Text me if you are unhappy about a break-up…even if you forgot to tell me you were going out in the first place.

Text me if you have a cold. I know you know what to do, but it will make us both feel better if I tell you to get good rest and hydrate well.

Text me if you are changing majors…but not before you have a plan for a new major

Text me if you find the essentials of life: “eat, sleep, drink, pee, poop,” difficult. Especially the poop—no one will ever obsess about your bowels like a mother (except maybe a grandmother).

Text me when you are not in class (because I know you will be paying rapt attention to your professors and sucking every last bit of paid knowledge out of their craniums).

Text me sometimes at 1am with the understanding that I will be texting you sometimes at 7 am.

Text me to ask for the phone number of your dentist, but do not ask me to schedule the appointment for you.

Do not text and ask me to email your professors.

Do not text me to ask about your clothing choices for the day…unless you just want me to say you look beautiful.

Do not text me asking for college housing deadline information; you have the same access to the internet as I do. Plus, you are actually on campus!

Do text me to complain about the 4 loads of laundry you did all Saturday afternoon -it makes me happy to see you can survive on your own- and I promise not to lecture you on how you allowed the laundry to pile up.

And of course, text me out of the blue just to say ❤️.

Mom

aka Naline Lai, MD

©2016 Two Peds in a Pod®