Dr. Kardos’s dad is a pediatrician and during our long grueling hours of residency training he’d always serve as a source of encouragement. One of my favorite memories will always be the proud look in his eyes years later as he watched his daughter present at a physician conference.

Today we honor all Dr. Dads- dads or father figures- who help their children in times of crisis, illness, or injury.  Following is a tribute sent by one of our readers, Jennifer Taylor.

Happy Father’s Day!

Dr. Lai with Dr. Kardos
_________________________

We are parents to three boys so needless to say, our house is always full of cuts, bruises or injuries of some sort. Band-Aids and “feel better” kisses are a regular part of our daily activity. And while my husband is a great “Doctor Dad” to all three boys, it is his every day involvement in my youngest son’s medical care that makes him a truly amazing father.

My son Luke is 4 years old. At the age of 6 months, he was diagnosed with an in-utero stroke. We were told at the time of his diagnosis that he may never talk or walk based on where the stroke hit. We’ve had several years of therapy, doctor’s appointments and testing. Throughout it all, Kris has been an amazing supporter- both for Luke and me.

While I tend to see the glass half-empty, Kris is perpetually positive. He always says “When Luke can” instead of “If”. He does research on therapies that might shake things up in Luke’s progress and is certainly a very active participator in all the therapies we receive. Kris stops in to chat with all the therapists so that they know he is Luke’s Dad. He is at every medical appointment: driving us to CHOP at 7:00 in the morning because he knows I hate driving on Route 76 by myself; heading up to Lehigh Valley Hospital for a speech consult; sitting by me while Luke has some sort of test done, holding my hand and telling me it will be okay. He is compassionate throughout it all and yet he still pushes Luke to succeed, knowing that our little boy can accomplish anything. When Luke gets frustrated, it is my husband who can calmly get him to try, try again. And they say laughter is the best medicine so my husband pulls out all the jokes and silly behavior he knows to get Luke to go “one more time.”

I really could go on and on about what a wonderful Dad my husband is but the true testament to him is sitting on the floor next to me singing and playing. Luke wouldn’t be where he is now without Kris.

And for that, I am eternally grateful.

Jennifer Taylor
©2013 Two Peds in a Pod®

What you forgot to tell the babysitter

The first time my husband and I went out to dinner after our daughter was born, we walked out the door, got into the car, and sat in the driveway as my husband fretted over how our daughter was doing with the babysitter. “Did you see?” he said. “She looked sad when we left.” After a few minutes elapsed, he still had not started the car engine. Finally, to allay his fears, I told him to sneak back to the house and peek into the window. He came back amazed. “She’s fine,” he said with relief.

Finding someone to appropriately look after your child can be a difficult task. Even if you resist the urge to run back and check on your child when you leave the house, you may wonder as you pull away if there is anything you forgot to tell the babysitter. Chances are, you didn’t think of much beyond leaving your cell phone number and the name of your destination. Linda Miller, a nurse who taught a babysitting course for years for Child, Home, and Community (a United Way agency serving Bucks and Montgomery Country, Pennsylvania), shares with us the information she leaves her own babysitters:

Parents’ cell numbers

Kids’ names, ages and birthdays

House address (chances are, if your sitter lives down the street, she or he doesn’t know your house number)

The full name of the town you live in (is it Borough or Township?) In Nurse Miller’s case, there is a street of the same name in the neighboring township. Ever since the pizza delivery guy went to the wrong house one hungry night, her family is careful to be very clear as to where they live.

The nearest cross street. This important piece of information helps emergency responders confirm they are heading to the correct address. (It could also be helpful if your sitter is old enough to order pizza!)

Where you are going – name and address and phone number.

Phone number to call in an emergency: For most it is 911

Poison control center phone number : 1-800-222-1222

Height and weight of each child – for emergency medication administration

Allergies – to Foods and Medications

Since seconds count in an emergency, even if your sitter is a regular fixture in your home, it doesn’t hurt to point out the safety information each time, should he or she need it.

Remember to bring your sitter’s cell phone number with you so you can reach her, in case you cannot get through on your own house phone.

When is my child old enough to babysit?

Somehow the years passed quickly, and the tables have turned. My daughter herself is a babysitter. How will you know when your own child is old enough to babysit? First ask yourself whether he will be too scared to stay home without an adult. Then ask yourself if he can solve problems on his own. The age that kids start to babysit themselves or younger siblings varies. Ultimately parents need to judge their child’s maturity for themselves. Tweens can be mature enough to babysit themselves and a younger sibling for short period of time. In fact, the American Red Cross babysitting training course (which can be taken online) is offered to kids 11 years and older. Even if your child is not babysitting anyone else, but staying by himself at home, a course will give your child valuable self-care tips.

Outline specific Do’s and Don’ts for your child. Walk them through what to do if the doorbell rings or if the phone rings. What activities are they allowed to do? Are they allowed to eat? Cook? Can friends come over? What will they do in a power outage? What if someone gets injured or sick while you are out? Familiarize him with basic first aid.

Keep anything which is potentially harmful such as medications, guns, and alcohol inaccessible. Make sure you are comfortable with parental controls for computers and the television.

And of course…give them Nurse Miller’s list from above.

Naline Lai, MD with Julie Kardos, MD
©2013 Two Peds in a Pod®

 In honor of  Father’s Day, we would love to hear your anecdotes of any “Doctor Dad” moments your children have experienced.  Tell us about how your child’s dad or any father figure in your child’s life helped your child through a tough time, an illness, or an injury. Send us your anecdotes to twopedsinapod@gmail.com by June 4 and we will include the top stories in our Father’s Day post. 

Thank you in advance,

Drs. Kardos and Lai   

This Mother’s Day we bring you definitions inspired by our children and our patients. Don’t think we’ll out-hip Urban Dictionary, but we’re moms…. by definition we are not hip. Enjoy your day.

Sleep walker: the daytime state of a new mom.

Sweater: a garment worn by a child when his mother feels cold.

Displacement:  a vacation with toddlers.

Sick: something moms are not allowed to become.

WOW: MOM upside-down.

Mommometer: a mom’s hand on a feverish forehead.

One zillion: number of times a mom says “wash your hands” to her children over the course of their childhoods.

Yesterday: when the sports/camp/school field trip form was due.
Today: when the child hands the mom the sports/camp/school field trip form.

Working mother: Every Mom

Water torture: a grade-school son’s interpretation of a mom’s announcement of “shower night.”

Boomerang: a mom’s realization that her child is acting like she did at the same age.

Happy Mother’s Day from your two Pediatrician Moms,

Julie Kardos, MD and Naline Lai, MD

©2013 Two Peds in a Pod®

John Gannon
Psychologist, Marriage and Family Therapist

The antihistamine quandry
 Junior’s nose is starting to twitch
His nose and his eyes are starting to itch.
 As those boogies flow
You ask oh why, oh why can’t he learn to blow? 
 It’s nice to finally see the sun
But the influx of pollen is no fun. 
Up at night, he’s had no rest,
But which antihistamine is the best?

It’s a riddle with a straight forward answer. The best antihistamine, or “allergy medicine” is the one which works best for your child with the fewest side effects. Overall, I don’t find much of a difference between how well one antihistamine works versus another for my patients. However, I do find a big difference in side effects.

Oral antihistamines differ mostly by how long they last, how well they help the itchiness, and their side effect profile.  During an allergic reaction, antihistamines block one of the agents responsible for producing swelling and secretions in your child’s body, called histamine. Prescription antihistamines are not necessarily “stronger.” In fact, at this point there are very few prescription antihistamines. Most of what you see over-the-counter was by prescription only just a few years ago. And unlike some medications, the recommended dosage over-the-counter is the same as what we used to give when we wrote prescriptions for them.

The oldest category, the first generation antihistamines work well at drying up nasal secretions and stopping itchiness but don’t tend to last as long and often make kids very sleepy.  Diphendydramine (brand name Benadryl) is the best known medicine in this category.  It lasts only about six hours and can make people so tired that it is the main ingredient for many over-the-counter adult sleep aids.  Occasionally, kids become “hyper” and are unable to sleep after taking this medicine. Other first generation antihistamines include Brompheniramine (eg. brand names Bromfed and  Dimetapp) and Clemastine (eg.brand name Tavist).

The newer second generation antihistamines cause less sedation and are conveniently dosed only once a day. Loratadine (eg. brand name Alavert, Claritin) is biochemically more removed from diphenhydramine than Cetirizine (eg. brand Zyrtec) and runs a slightly less risk of sleepiness. However, Cetirizine tends to be a better at stopping itchiness.
Now over-the-counter, fexofenadine (eg brand name Allegra) is a third generation antihistamine.  Theoretically, because a third generation antihistamine is chemically the farthest removed from a first generation antihistamine, it causes the least amount of sedation. The jury is still out.

If you find your child’s allergies are breaking through oral antihistamines, discuss adding a different category of oral allergy medication, eye drops or nasal sprays with your pediatrician.
Because of decongestant side effects in children, avoid using an antihistamine and decongestant mix.

Back to our antihistamine poem:
Too many choices, some make kids tired,
While some, paradoxically, make them wired. 
Maybe while watering flowers with a hose,
Just turn the nozzle onto his runny nose. 

Naline Lai, MD with Julie Kardos, MD

©2013 Two Peds in a Pod®

Updated  from the original  post April 10, 2011

Stunned, you find your child’s third quarter report card under his bed. Your child told you he got an A, but the teacher’s report shows a lower grade. A much lower grade. You are horrified, not about the grade, but about the lying. Refrain from running straight to school and yanking him out of class to confront him.

Lying is not uncommon in childhood. For very young children, “lying” is a normal part of developmental. Preschool children are at the developmental stage where they exaggerate and tell tall tales. Preschoolers rarely have a hidden agenda and truly believe in their fantasies.

Beyond the preschool age, there often is a hidden agenda. “There is a reason behind their lies,” says Pennsylvania based Buckingham Friends School teacher of over 25 years, Nancy Sandberg. Try to figure out your child’s underlying reason for lying. During elementary school, children develope a sense of right and wrong. They begin to lie to avoid disappointing a parent, to avoid a perceived punishment, or for attention. In their teens, kids protect their privacy and begin to separate their identity from their parents. Teens may lie because they are afraid of losing face with peers or in order to get something they want. A lying teen may also be covering up underlying problems such as alcoholism.

Before talking to your child about his lying, clear your head of anger. An emotionally charged confrontation will end up in a blow-up rather than a rational discussion. If he lies when you talk to him, state that you are not sure that he is telling the truth and plan a later time to discuss the issue. Also, do not ask your child questions to which you already know the answer and avoid giving him a reason to lie further. In the report card example, when your child comes home, do not ask him where his report card is or if he had seen his grades. Instead, start the conversation with facts: “I found your report card. I see that your grades are not what you said they would be. I am concerned because you hid the truth from me. Let’s talk about it.”

Sometimes anger may impede your ability or your child’s ability to have a rational discussion. Wait until things cool down or have an objective third party present during your conversation. In your discussion, give your child an alternative to lying. For instance, if she is concerned about your reaction to a grade, tell her to go to another adult first, such as a teacher, if the situation reoccurs and they can approach you together. Talk about how your child would feel if someone lied to her. Discussing a book with a protagonist who lied can give your child a way to indirectly discuss her own situation. And reassure, reassure, reassure her that in no way does the incident diminish your love for her.

Keep in mind, most episodes of lying are isolated incidents. However, a child who chronically lies and also shows negativity and hostility or defiance towards adults should be evaluated by a health care professional. For more information, click on the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry’s site www.aacap.org.

Sandberg proudly recalls a child whom she worked with years ago. At the beginning of the school year, the child lied about his school work. Later, the child went on to play Hercules in the school play. Sandberg and the child talked about how like Hercules, he had struggled, but because he faced his challenges head-on, he turned into a hero.

Naline Lai, MD and Julie Kardos, MD
©2013 Two Peds in a Pod®

Originally published April 18, 2011